Throughout the entirety of my life, things were never really quite in focus, even with glasses and contact lenses. I could make out most shapes and things, but they were always a bit blurry. Given that my lens prescription is -9, I just chalked this up to a side effect of my high prescription. However over the last half a year, I started seeing double a lot more frequently, which freaked me out. Once it got really severe, I went to the optometrist and told him what was happening and after running some visual tests, he diagnosed me with esotropia and referred me to an ophthalmologist. After meeting with the ophthalmologist, she confirmed the diagnosis and told me that I had strabismus, and the deviation was large enough to require surgery to straighten them out. Strabismus, or sometimes known as crossed eyes, is a condition where your eyes do not look straight ahead at the same point, which can lead to double vision and other issues. In my case, my left eye was turning inward and that triggered the double vision. Apparently I’ve had this my entire life, but my brain was managing it well enough so that I could still mostly see. The doctor theorized that the muscles weakened from correcting the deviation and couldn’t keep up with the strain, which is why I started seeing double more frequently. From the pictures below, you can see the difference
On June 26, 2025, I had the surgery to correct the strabismus by tightening the medial rectus muscles in both of my eyes. Given that I was under general anesthesia, the surgery felt quick and overall, painless. There was some swelling and discomfort immediately after, but that subsided over time. Check out the before and after photos below to see the difference:
Before the surgery, notice how my eyes turn inwards
Immediately after the surgery, now my eyes are straight
After leaving the surgery center and having the dilation wear off, a whole new world opened up to my eyes. I had no idea that things in life were supposed to look this sharp and crisp with my glasses on. I had always thought the slight blurring of the vision was normal with a prescription that high, but I was extremely wrong. Looking out the window of my apartment, I could see the names of buildings that I didn’t even know were there before. Living on the 23rd floor, I could see each person walking on the street below in super clear detail and see what’s happening on the street below, whereas before it was usually just blobs of people. Things that I have seen every single day look extremely different and more beautiful, even if I would’ve thought of them as mundane before. Another added benefit is that my brain feels way less fatigued, now that my eyes are functioning like they are supposed to and not giving it extra work anymore. I used to have floaters and I thought that was normal, but now they have completely disappeared.
Part of the reason I am writing this post is to encourage anyone who is experiencing similar symptoms or unclear vision to double check with an optometrist or ophthalmologist. For 33 years, I had no idea that I had this condition and it took things getting worse in order for me to get diagnosed. Some other visual things that I experienced that I thought were normal were seeing lights as flared, similar to lens flare in a camera. Now, the lights are in focus and there is no flare, I can see the soft glow of the light directly from the source. Another thing that I thought was normal was having to squint to read things with my glasses on, when in reality you should be able to read things pretty clearly with them on at medium distances. Essentially, if your vision is not super crisp and clear, even with corrective lenses, something may be up and I encourage you to see a medical professional as soon as possible.
While part of me is frustrated that I wasn’t diagnosed earlier in order to have this surgery sooner, I am extremely grateful for this surgery literally giving me a new perspective on life. I have been joking with my friends and saying that I’ve been living life in 360p, now I’m living life in 8K. As a photographer, I’m excited to take more photos and capture the world in a way that I have never seen before. I genuinely believe that my life experiences just received a huge upgrade and I can’t wait to make new memories with my newfound clarity and detail. Part of me feels like I need to re-experience every single piece of visual media I’ve consumed over my life and revisit all the places I’ve been to, just to see how they really look. For now though, I’m taking it day by day and enjoying my new life.